Laugh? or Cry?

Right. So I went to Wally World today, kid free and I wanted to just check and see if i could find some sort of light dress to wear this weekend.

It's supposed to be ungodly hot, and humid, and well it's Chicago so gross is a better word to describe this summer heat we have.

Oh I didn't tell you, well I have before, but that was last year. Get excited people, why? Because it's...

PRIDE WEEKEND!! PRIDE MONTH! and well Sunday is the BIG Pride Parade in Chicago!!

Can't wait, it's my 4th year going!!

So back to Wally World looking for a dress, I found this purple sparkly tube top lookin' thing. OMG. Let's just say I didn't know wether to laugh at myself, which I did but then I got disgusted and wanted to cry.

 Note that I have yet to attemt dieting. So far I can only make it through breakfast... sad I know. But I try. Everyday... and fail...

Let's just say today was depressing in that sad little 4x4 dressing room... so sad...

Moving on, we shall wear the white board shorts, made of cotton, and the black and white tube top that hangs down over some of my ass. Either way I look cute, and will accent my black and white outfit with a rainbow of pretty!

Can't wait, be prepared to be bombarded with too many pictures of things you probably could go your life with out seeing. But I like to share like that. (grin)

Oh, I need to charge my camera and empty my SD cards... yes cards as in WAY to many pictures...

Let me share a bit from the years past...

One of the scariest people in pink. ever...

Ass.

and my favorite, Ronald McDonald and Burger King getting married... CAN NOT wait to see what there will be this year!!

Calm.

Dear Target,

Thanks for having a nice clean family bathroom. No I mean it. You chose to use a nice clean scent and it wasn't the gag-me-lemon that is usually used in bathrooms.


Your staff was very friendly, and my children behaved. Bagel even walked along side the cart and enjoyed shopping (she helped the staff keep busy by loading things onto the bottom of the cart, and then we give the check out lady a big pile of what we don't want. Your welcome)


It was nice.


Dear Local Mall,

Thank you for being nice and quiet on a Thursday afternoon. Shopping with two kids by myself was fun today. I enjoy stopping at any older person that wants to say "hello" and visit with you guys, makes their day and mine too.


The stores were clean, well stocked, and thanks to Hallmark and Yankee Candle for having the perfect gifts.


It was one of those days, where you sit down at the end and go "hmrph, that wasn't so bad. I wish everyday was as calm and uneventful*.


I am planning to have more of these days. I like having just house work, and kids to play with, as my day to day agenda. I am taking out an upcoming Stamp Camp, I just need a break from the class and the planning (last night was my big "Graveyard Gala" Halloween party, we all dress up, eat and do projects)


I also found out that I am hosting Christmas Eve for Spaghetti's whole family, it's fine, ever since his Gramma passed in February, and so I have some cleaning, planning, and freaking out to do. (must make room in the schedule for that)


*Uneventful up until Weaky trippped over a chair leg, and got a big o' knot on his head. He's ok, just another boo boo.

Manic Monday on Wednesday. My social life, as a cancer/leo pirate, and all I want to be is Tinkerbell damn it.

Do you recycle? Why or why not?
Yes and no. Yes if I remember to take the cans and boxes, or plastic bottles and put them in the BIG recycle bin we have. But the no part is because we should have a box for papers by the desk upstairs, and I SO should have a box for paper scraps in my art room!


Would you rather be a pirate or a prince/princess?
Pirate. I am rough and tough. Don't take shit off nobody, and I am not very lady like. I would steal if need be. I would kill for survival. I just think the whole motion sick thing on the boat would make me a land pirate.

Being a princess would be nice, for the money, but the whole requirements to be nice to other people, even if they suck would be no fun. Plus isn't there a requirement to marry royalty? Ugg.

Arrrrr, Me's name is Jack the Pirate. I kick ass, and talk shit. I be one of those pixie little pirates. Speaking of Pixies... maybe instead of a pirate, since we are on the whole make believe thing. Maybe I could just be a Tinker Fairy. Ah, Tinkerbell is my favorite...


Are you into astrology? If yes, how does it affect your life?
Yes? Sure I am a Cancer, my kids are Taurus, and Gemini, and Spaghetti is a Aquarius. My parents are Libra's. I know that I am a Cancer with Leo tendencies, since my birthday falls at the end of my sign.

Do I rotate my life around it? Do I avoid those that I don't mesh with according to the stars? Nah. I do however think it's amazing how these things can peg you though. Since I am not religious I am up for fun astrology. But it doesn't decide if I am leaving the house or not that day.


How often do you change your toothbrush?
Every few months. I think your supposed to do it every 3 months?


What is your favorite item of clothing to shop for?
Hats? Is that clothing, or an accessory? Well I still say hats. I just got a really cute hat in Tennessee. Love it! Brown and pink, with some funky design on it. Looks like the old Irish boy hats, but smaller and girly.

Pants suck to buy. My ass is huge, and my waist is small, so when I squat my whole ass falls out the back. And the belt idea blows too. Then you have a ton of jean cinched together. HELLO uncomfortable!

Shirts are ok, we don't have the money for me to shop, so I don't really enjoy it. I get stressed buying one $12 shirt at Target, every 6 months.


Do you use social media (Twitter, MySpace, Facebook, etc.)? Which do you use most often?
I used to use MySpace, it was ok, but since I could find SO many friends it was great.

I had Facebook too. But I hated the plain page, and it was boooring.

Maternal Mirth got me hooked on Twitter, and I loved it. Sorry I am not there much.

Funny thing is, it seemed like overnight, Facebook took over the world! I love it. I keep it up most of the day, stopping by to update my status whenever I pass the computer. I love seeing everyone update, and the comments to go with.

That is why Twitter is ehh, I like it, but it's kinda a one way conversation. And I have my status on Facebook.

MySpace is a thing of the past. I SO don't check it, maybe once a month? I still need to find some friends from there on Facebook, sure Facebook isn't so fancy, but instead of wasting my time with new layouts, or widgets, I am just in change my status, read my friends status' and make a few comments and I am out! Fun!! Plus the LivingSocial things are addicting enough on there!


If you enjoyed these questions, go to the above link and check out Manic Monday every Monday. I know, I know, it's Wednesday...

You owe me $200

So I go over to Bed Bath and Beyond yesterday on my enjoyable afternoon of no kids, no husband, a hot date with me myself and I.



I needed square plates, glass ones. For a scrapbooking class next month. I will have to post a picture, to confusing to explain, and I will be SO off subject.



Anywho, so I get my 8 plates, a new king bed pillow for Spaghetti (since I hoard all the other 3 and leave him a skimpy little pillow) a boo boo cold patch in the cute shape of Tigger, and I picked up Spaghetti's other birthday present from my parents. (can't tell you, sometimes he reads this!)



And so I proceed to the checkout, still high off my coffee buzz, and my quality me time. I get to the cashier, freeze. Look for other cashiers. Shit, she's my only option. And I know she saw me look around. Damn it.


Right so this cashier, lets call her Pager, since back in 1997 she borrowed my pager since I was upgrading to my first cell phone. It was back in the day when you could pay your bill a year in advance, and I paid my $200 for the year. Well after a few months of not paying back her $20 a month agreement, Pager disappeared.



About 6 months later she stopped by my mom's house, to see me. I introduced her to my new boyfriend, Spaghetti. After a short time the pager I "lent her" went off. I said "hey how about some payments?"

She had to hurry up and leave.

That was over 10 years ago. My best friend, dumped our 7 year friendship, because her lame ass couldn't even look at me to say, "hey, I can't afford to pay you, and my boyfriend won't pay anymore, so I am just going to ignore you. Forever"


Yep, that was awkward at the Bed Bath and Beyond counter. She said "hi" I gave her a fake smile, and hoped it looked fake. I need not make a scene, I need not remind her. She knows.


I know she got the message.


Her cousin, is friends with one my friends, and anywho, they asked me a few years back if I would still be Pagers friend and if she could contact me...


I said, tell Pager that she owes me $200, and then after that, I still don't want to be her friend.


I'm pretty sure by the look on her face. She got the message.

She didn't ruin my happy buzz, just made me throw up in my mouth a little...

Would you like ice with that snow?

(these are what I call grassicles. They are the little blades of grass that didn't get buried in snow.

And were turned into grassicles due to the ice. See the one on the far right for best example)

I SO wanted to go out bummin' at a few stores, there is a Jewel Osco and the Halmark down the road. I mean like 5 minutes down the road. The both have fun 50-75% off sales, nope canceled plans. Bah humbug on this shitastical weather!

Snow? Nope. I would love for it to be snow. We've gots us some freezing rain. Which means driveway of ice. Is now a driveway of new ice. Dirty bitches.

BUT the good news is it should get up to 40 degrees out today, which means we have flood warnings!


SUPER!


Should have gotten a canoe for Christmas. Then I could have gone out.


And we were talking about going out to eat with Spaghetti's cousin and her husband, Loren. Maybe a possibility, again, if this 40 degree heat wave can dent the ice.


Now again to explain why I like snow. Because it can be moved.


Snow? Get shovel. Move. Plow. Carry on with life. Small delay.


All those fuckers that say the would rather it be freezing then warmer with snow. Well here you go. I hope your happy.


(this would be a frozen shut garbage can. Now where exactly do we put the dirty diapers, cat shit and holiday leftovers?)


Freezing weather? Rain becomes ICE (not snow) and now we have a 3 inch fucking layer of ice, snapping of trees (not kidding) coating every surface, and pissing in my cornflakes, so I can't go bummin' with my mommy and kids today.

(this is my frozen Lilac bush, coated with ice)



Boooooooo. Oh so you lovelies with your chilly weather, and your "my goodness I need a scarf today!" or "Man I can't wait till it gets back up to the 70's next week" can go sit on a stick.

Yes I am bitter, not because of the cold, but because I am denied my day out. If this shithole weather fucks with my scrapbooking weekend I will be livid.

How do I really feel? Call me.
1-800-winter-blows.

Oh Merry Christmas everyone! (tee hee!)