Absolute Rambling. Enjoy wankers!

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Fuck me in the goat ass

What? Fuck me.

I woke up yesterday feeling like I gargled sand. Hoping to shake it, I took an Airborne. I went to bed with what I thought was the begining of a cold.

Damn them all. I was right. Headache, sore throat, mucas in head. Gross. Best part is I've got shit to do this week. And by that I mean more then my usual sit around and play mommy/laudry bitch.

Today will hopefully be rest, and pick up around the house when I am up to it. Oh and get stuff together for the garage sale

Tomorrow is the get together (here of coarse) for Weaky's birthday. (Just grandparents, Frances and Aerial)

Thursday is my Lia Sophia party, damn it. I told the lady I was busy as shit this week, but for Sarah to get her "party credit" I had to book in April. Pushy bitch. I just want my free stuff.

Friday is set up, and presale garage sale day out at my mom's.

Saturday is the big Garage sale day. Huge day the whole damn subdivision does it at the same time, tons of money can be made, BUT feeling like shit won't help.

So that's my pre coffee bitch for the day. Spaghetti will be of no use, he has back to back jobs all week (except for Weaky's birthday party)

Fuack. me. in. the. goat. ass.

Monday Minute

Good morning, I was visiting my newer and fantastic bloggy friend, Duel Mom, ver at Were at Dad's That Week and I saw she played along with this fun little link. Play too, just click the link to add yourself.

1 - What drugs have you done in your life?
Squeaky clean? Proud to say that this bizarre behavior, and random bullshit babbling is all natural. Besides my daily overdose of coffee, I have never smoked (anything!) and I drink very rarely. Don't get me wrong, I do love to chill out with my favoirte Boones Farm, but it never seems to be often enough!


2 - A/S/L?

31.5 (32 on July 19th!)
Female... and if your wondering how often? Often enough. DH would of coarse love it more, but every few days sometimes everyday, is fine with me.


3 - Do you pick your nose?

Really? Who doesn't? So that is a yes.


4 - What's your favorite childhood cartoon

I was a My Little Pony, Care Bears, and Thunder Cats (I know weird combo right?) oh and I loved Duck Tales, and Gummi Bears too.

Once I was a teenager I was in love with Animaniacs!


5 - List the URL, of what you believe to be the best blog post you've ever done

Maybe not my best work, but one of my favorites, because it really helps you learn a bit about me.

What's new with two. xoxo...

We had a date today...

A you and me only kinda date...

Where you laughed...

And laughed some more...

You ate your favorite McD's pancakes, with apple juice...

You love to watch the people, and to see the way they decorate each season or holiday...

You have a curious way about you Weaky Man, and I love it...

The date to McD's was a treat, and T@rget afterwards was to shop for your present. I had some little things for you...

Like these fun realistic dinosaurs, they have smooshy beads inside them. You LOVE your Tonka trucks, and the blue want is a bubble wand is from Wally World.

Oh and the Chuck fire station, you love the little Tonka trucks so why not...

This was our "big" present to you. All 120 pieces of wooded train and pieces for you, and YES I know it says 3+ on the box, AND that inside it says it is specificly made for 3+ because of small parts, BUT I am in charge here, so I say it's ok...

Oh so while I was on a roll of breaking toy age limit rules, I got you the train mechanic house too...

Bagel picked this out for you, your Gramma Mc bought it for you, from her, so whatever, I think you'll get a kick out of it, it vibrates something wicked...

Your Gramma Mc also spent a bit o' $$ and got you and your sister the fancy pants Step 2 Welcome Home house for the back yard...

Since Bagel's birthday is June 2nd it's a big ol' combo gift. One would assume this was their ONLY present birthdays and Christmas combined, but I do not doubt there will be more... there always is...

Enough about presents and random birthday fun. Let's talk about you little guy...

You just started sitting on my lap, and we either go on Youtube to watch video's (you really like Baby Einstein ones) or Sproutonline.com to see your favorite friends!

We go to Starbucks, Mommies favorite place to chill with you one on one, you love to go pick out your organic mush in a capri sun like pouch (think applesauce consistancy, but he LOVES them)

We hike in the woods, and you wear my Michigan hat, and try to nap on my shoulders! (Too cute little man!)

You look like your 4 here instead of 2! So big!!

You and your sister are getting along better... sort of... well you tollerate each other, only if there are NO toys involved... or attention from parents... or grandparents... well lets just enjoy this moment here in the woods as you two share a moment...

When I was house sitting for the Queen and Carrots (Frances too) while in Florida, I was silly to let you loose and go clean the litter boxes, while I was getting assulted by a freak of a siamese cat, you were removing the rocks, dirt and leaves from Queen's plant. ALL over her dining room!! So you were covered in dirt, thank gawd I hadn't watered that plant prior to you!

So I changed your butt, or at least stripped you, and you ran off, so I let you. And you kept running around butt naked with this big wooden goose... what a silly handful of a boy I have!!

Tomorrow is just the 4 of us celebrating, then Wednesday is with Queen, Carrots, Frances, Aerial, and Gramma and Grampa Mc, maybe even Great Grampa Ed. We will be having a "Cars" Disney themed party, since you love the movie and Mater is your favorite. It's hard to pick, you love Buzz Lightyear, and Cookie Monster too just as much!

I meant for this post to be some tear jerking, emotional over load of a post. A birthday post that could move anyone to tears. I seem to just have a mismosh of this last months fun pictures, but I must say this...

Happy 2nd Birthday to my boy. Born April 25th, 2008. At 4:06 pm, 7 lbs, 10 oz, and 21 1/2 inches long. You came into this world a small mohawked little guy

You are a sweet boy, who over the last two years have grown into such an amazing little toddler. Your gibberish speaking with some english mixed in has everyone anticipating what you will say.

I can't wait to hear your opinion, your views, and your idea's. I can't wait to spend my life getting to know you.

I once said that if I have a little girl my life would be complete. Having your sister first made me think it didn't matter if you were a boy or a girl I was just fine with either.

Had I known what a little boy does to his mother's heart, I would have wanted you even more. You make me want you to be my Momma's boy, to come to me with any and every problem. I don't so much favor you over your sister, but you two are definiatly different to me. Love is equal, but different.

I hope your birthday is great, I hope the world for you. Lots of hugs and kisses.

More then my life,

Mommy

xo...

OMG! There's been an Eclipse!!

To my fantastic blogger friend, Becky, over at My Crazy Beautiful Life had this on her Facebook post, thankyouthankyouthankyou!! I love this preview of Eclipse! Had to share!

Rest in Peace. Western Style

Spaghetti Dinner at my mom's house.
Bets that the leftover spaghetti wouldn't fit into the tupperware.
Confirmation Sponsor.
Smart electrician, who always worked on projects with my dad.
Long hair.
Bachlor with fast fancy car.
Monday's we we would go visit Gramma Wanda in the nursing home.
Watching Chip and Dale cartoons with all the cousins at your house.
Kitter (RIP)
Your love for old westerns.
Advice on the condo Spaghetti and I first lived in.
Queen Mom's 50th surpirse birthday party, you and your brother.
That last Christmas when mom had you and Uncle Jim over, it was the last time you three were together.
When family used to be your first priority.
Your new house in BFE, the wood, the hummingbirds, your big pool, the great land, and all your ideas.

Those are my happy memories of you. For 29 years of my life I looked up to you. I thought of you as a great Uncle who was smart, but you were easily swayed by your new wife, her family and your other sister. They told you crazy things, like my mom just visited and took pictures of your house to go show your neices and nephews so they would come down and cause your brother to die.

That we were just nosey, and we were the ones that caused your brother to drink himself to death. If we hadn't show those pictures to the kids... really? Someone who has had  a drinking problem since I was a little kids, and who just lost his wife 2 year prior for drinking herself to death, you didn't think he died of a broken heart? So he ended it by drinking till it was over?!?

I'm sure it was all my mom's fault thought. I mean she did nothing but cook for you, clean your house, and be there for you. You two were close. You both had each others back, and that evil other sister and your new wife made up stories.

Stories that made you call my mom a few months after your brother died, and told her that you wanted nothing to do with her ever again. That it was her fault that Jim died, you cursed me and her for taking too many pictures, and for showing Jims kids. Then your sister told my mom that she was secretly copying all the emails between sisters and sending them to new wife.

What kind of sister does that? What kind of brother blames his sister for the death of their brother?

I am sad today. I am sad that even though for the last year my happy memories were covered with sad ones. Of hateful words that will never be erased. I did love you very much, and I do still want to be sad for the loss of your life.

I just wished you hadn't listened with your mind. But if you would have listened with your heart, and know your little sister ment no harm. She was proud of you and her brother. Your big homes, and pretty yards. Hoping for a life that should have happened a decade ago.

She wanted nothing but to love you and be proud of you. She looked up to you.

So rest in peace to my Uncle Rich. From what I hear there will be no service, he just wants some old westerns to walk him down to his grave, plop him in the dirt and say a few nice words.

So plop him in the dirt. Say a few nice words. And call it a day. Rest in peace Uncle Rich.

Lists, Lectures and Laundry

I called my dearest friend Maternal Mirth last week for a chat. We got into discussing housework, and she told me she had lists.


Now I often hear of lists that people make, and prior to our conversation I had just started the week before of making a list for the next day, of things that had to be done. It all started when Sophie had to take antibiotics and get a foot soak twice a day (upper toe nail infection) so to remember I would write it down. I also started to add things that were random, like calling the Village Hall to find out what that ungodly noise was coming from the bathroom when you used the water (I thought the pipes were going to burst the whole damn floor humms and shakes. The Village Idiot  Plumming inspector said to push a button inside the toilet. I seriously thought he was blowing smoke up my ass because I was a girl, but needless to say he was right. We have to do it each time it happens. To weird though. ANYWAY off track here...)

So these lists were becoming a daily thing, and quite useful. My thought process on lists prior to this was, What the fuck, I've got 704 things to do today, and NO time to write it all down. Fuck it.

Not fast forward a week to my conversation with Maternal Mirth, and how she has a "list" that she hand wrote, and she photo copied it to check off. She says she tries to do this list 2x's a week. She also has a "maids list" of more detailed work (think dusting baseboards, cleaning blinds) this list she tries to do 1-2x's a month.

Key word "try". I asked her to email me her lists, and as soon as I got them I printed one copy, then sat down one morning with my cup of inspiration juice, Starbucks coffee! in my hand and tweeked her list according to my house...lets just say her one sheet is my two sheets. I also have more rooms. She has more square footage but mine is divided up into tinier rooms.

I wasn't too crazy with my list, keeping it simple for me, but enought that I could keep up with housework. The maids list is probably not going to be used for quite some time, because I need to get into a routine of simple housework before I get out my rubber gloves and Q-Tips for the detailing.

So I called her a few days later, because I was sitting on Facebook for hours, I had a messy house, and needed inspiration to get off my lazy ass and do something. I was looking for a lecture, possibly some yelling and screaming, telling me how horrible of a housewife I was. What did I get?

Sweet Maternal Mirth saying "Don't be hard on yourself. I said in my email that I TRY to do my lists. So just try. If you make your housework evil and chore, you won't want to do it. If you just do a bit at a time, and reward yourself with things like the art room, and facebook, you will feel much better."

As much as I was looking for a screaming lecture, or at least a stern voice, she has known me for close to 3 decades, and knows that force doesn't work for me. Glitter, sunshine and rainbows is what inspires me to work. So be it.

I do need to keep with the lists, I picked Thursdays and Sundays as my work days. Thursday is the day after my classes I teach so I am not concerned with them, and Sunday is like everyone elses Fridays (Spaghetti is off work Mondays & Tuesdays)

I am hoping that I can keep with the lists, and my laundry, if anyone cares (is anyone still reading this excitement?) is doing well. I am keeping up with it for the most part, I am trying (again key word is TRY) to keep it off the floors, and keep it moving. I know Maternal Mirth can do her's twice a week, I do believe if I did that, I would never keep up. Maybe someday, till then I do laundry almost every day.

There's your update on life around here. It's been cleaning, and purging. I have an enormous garage sale coming up on May 1st, we set up April 30th, and let the early birds pre shop a bit, it's a subdivision thing and people come from as far as Chicago to shop! (Were bout an hour away)

I will be spending all my free time from now till then (besides Weaky's birthday Sunday!) getting ready! Oh and Happy Earth Day!!

I'm getting depresed, but drama free.

My stomach is bigger then my boobs. I am NOT pregnant. It made me depressed last night.

SO depressed that I pulled out my mom's "Gazelle" (think the Tony Little Gazelle) it's like a retarded eliptical machine. I did about 20 minutes last night, I felt like I wasn't getting anywhere, but hey the 20 minutes of effort made me feel like I tried.

Riiiigght. My fucking back is out today. Seriously, I tried. My mother empathised with the fact that we are wired the same. Working out for us needs to consist of walking and simple yoga.

I do need to drop the drive through dash I have been doing, WAY to much Volcano Taco's, and thank god McD's has stopped the Sweet Chili sauce.

I know I have been on my ass about my weight, but the issue is now that I am 10 lbs hevier then when I had Weaky, and now that I have joined the Lose It Bitch contest, AND a Biggest Loser too. I gained.... wait for it... 6 more pounds.

What. the. fuck.

I don't know what to do. I really want to be skinny, or at least able to do ANYTHING with out throwing out my back. Well yet again another post about my fat ass.

On another note I am sitting on my friends laptop after a Stampin' meeting, the other 8 girls are gossiping about church drama. Sigh... silly girls church women are SUCH drama. I rememer my mom and her friends Drama at our church when I grew up, we SO do NOT miss that.

Anywho, hope you enjoyed my weight issues and my bordom with church gossip.

Later Blogville.

Feisty

Viking Boy.

I thought this was fun to share. This is what I wanted to capture, it's the right before age 2 Weaky, and it's the gibberish talk, that is more talk then gibberish, and the sweetest little guy ever.

He just got this fun little castle from Gramma (she was just leaving in the video) and the scary tounge dragon is from the McD's happy meal toy. Plus the bad ass box turns into Viking horns. Awesome. Enjoy!

Color Renovation

I completly blame the company I demonstrate for, I have been trapped in my art room. Why you ask? What could possible be SUCH a big deal that I go hide in my art room till 2 am for 2 days?!?

"Color Renovation" is what they are calling it.

Well maybe a bit of what I do will help you understand. I am a Stampin' Up! demonstrator (I do classes in my home, or workshops at your home (think Pampered Chef) for a company that sells Rubber Stamps, Scrapbooking papers, supplies, accessories, die cutting system and dies.

I have been doing this for 5 1/2 years now, and love every minute of it. And when I was with the company for just a few months they took away 12 of their colors, and gave us 12 new ones (colors like Mint, and Mauve left, giving us Pumpkin Pie and Pixie Pink)

But now they are doing it again. BUT WAY BIGGER. SO big that we are going from 61 colors, to... 45.

That is HUGE.

As soon as I got the list, and had to wait ALL day for the kids to go to bed. I went straight to my art room, I had to reorganize and pull all the retiring colors, to make room for the 5 new colors, and find the 6 returning In Colors from previous years.

I had to pull, sort, and rearrange my...

Cardstock
Ink pads (both classic and craft)
Water Color Crayons
Markers

I still have to fix all my sponges (I have 1/4 wedges marked for each color) and my daubers (again OCD on marking for each color)

So this has caused me to completly rerarrange my art room. It is a mess, but a good one. Some people are planning on leaving the company for this big drastic change.

I find it refreshing and almost like getting a face lift on the old colors. Stampin' Up! prides itself on change and embracing the good it does for us as a company. So if you miss me so, be sure to tell SU! that they have driven an OCD girl like me insane!!

I know I don't usually do whole posts on my busniess, because this blog is more personal then anything, but this has definatly take over my life right now. Even Bagel was wondering why I was moving all my stuff around!!

And on a business note, if you are in any way shape or form interested in Stampin' Up! email me personally and I will give you my site info. Alright, enough business yadda yadda. Gots to go make this coffee buzz useful.

Miss me!

Easter Tramp

Happy Easter to you all! I don't care of your religious preferance AT ALL, I celebrate it for the sake of children who love imaginary bunnies that bring them fun gifts, and eating a great meal at my parents house.

Anywho, I am realizing more and more that the phrase "there are never enough hours in a day" is an understatement.

We all say it, but I am seriously feeling it. I have NO idea how I didn't get things done when I didn't have kids. Because with kids my days are cut in half with time to do anything. Make note the older they seem to get the easier it is to do things. So here's a hope that someday I can do things while they are awake.

I have everything from Stamp Camps to prep for, shit I still have to get out this quarters schedule, the meeting swaps, clean and organize the art room, keep up with my downline.

House wise there are the bills (gag) basic housework, laundry, dishes, and now added to it, I have the BIG Goose Lake Garage Sale coming up and I need to get ALL my shit together for that, I have boxes all over the house I am filling full of crap I don't need!!

More clutter = more time wasted cleaning, and finding the "place" for everything!

Plus there is the time with family, friends, and my "me time" and yes I do make that a priority. I have blogging (of coarse) scrapbooking and reading to keep me busy.

Shit. I have so much to do and NEVER enough time to do it. Well enough "me time" here, sorry it's short, kids need to be dropped of at the pool... if you know what I mean...