I can breathe again

Spaghetti and I had many long and daunting conversations about money this past weekend. Big ones, small ones, far fetched one, and serious ones.


With out giving too much information (too late!) we have been trying to get the taxes paid (we took them out of our escrow, the mortgage was fine, just the taxes just keep going up so high!) also with the taxes we had a bunch of medical to deal with (from Weaky's stupid "big head" check up's and Bagel's assault from the blinds over her window, and the dental from my crown) it has been a whole lotta medical, and a few other random bills.


Either way we did the money shuffle, we talked, reorganized things, and we are doing great. Yesterday I finalized the whole deal with balancing the checkbook, paying off the debt, and yes the taxes were paid (due Monday!)


I got so excited I organized the file drawer, to get the paper clutter off my big ass desk (big ass desk as in it takes up the WHOLE loft, and is a corner piece, with two side desks attached to the corner desk for the actual computer. LOTS of room for my clutter!) I still have more clutter to delete but there is actually room to breathe.


Speaking of breathing, we can breath again. Sometimes money gets so damn tight, it's like it is just chocking you. So we were able to pry the hands of bills from around our necks yet again.


Not saying I hit the lotto, or came into a boat load of money. And by the last post, you can see we just found ourselves a very nice monthly bill for the cute little beep beep in the garage! But with the way we sit and talk and discuss the money, all with no yelling, or arguing.


It's the one thing that I think keeps our marriage sane. We both know the money situation. We share everything, and we discuss what the plan of attack is.


Thanks Spaghetti for working with me, so we can both breathe again.

Manic Mondays. Vanilla, Super Why, and Jon & Kate...

It's been a while, so why not take t he last 3 Mondays in June to do some Manic Monday's...


Do you usually wear perfume/cologne? If so, what's your current favorite?
Yes I do. I love Happy or Happy Heart by Clinique, but my everyday is Vanilla Vanilla by Body Shop


What's the last book you've read that you thought was really good? If you don't have one, what looks promising on your to-be-read list?
Breaking Dawn, and with that you can include, Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse! LOVE them!


Fill in the blank: I wouldn't be caught dead _________.
Pretending to be some one else, just to fit in. I did that once. I realized that you either love me or hate me.

What is the last song that was stuck in your head and how did you get rid of it?
Super Why! Theme song. Still there. Even though Bagel is to young for all the reading, and letters, she still loves the show. It's cute. But I love Word World better.

If you had to say what one thing in your life best represents your freedom, what would it be?
My ability to be a SAHM. I mean sure from my side it's more like prison on days. But that is because I am jealous of all the parents who can drop their kids off at day care, and go stare at a computer for hours, while someone else wipes butts, and deals with ENDLESS whining. But on the other hand I get to be the one to see all the firsts, and what job lets you drink coffee, with your kids while hanging out in the pool? All day?


If you were invited to the White House for dinner tonight, what would you wear from your current wardrobe?
Probably my black $12 strapless Target dress. It goes past my knees, and is very nice. My other two dresses are more Marilyn Monroe-ish. Yah know, tie around the neck, and the clevage-a-showin. Not so White House-ish.

If you joined the circus, what act would you most want to perform?
Barker. Yep. I thought about it. I would like to sell tickets, and yell at people. Fun.

Would you generally be overdressed or underdressed at a party?
Over dressed. Even though I am more casual of a person, Spaghetti and I still dress up more for an event when we don't realize how chillax it will be.


Do you feel that children should be sheltered from unhappiness?
This is interesting. Since I JUST finished watching Jon & Kate plus 8, and it was the "separation" announcement.
I think the children should see as little arguing as possible. I think that you shouldn't pretend to like someone if you don't.
Like today Spaghetti and I just DID not get along. So we don't scream and fight, we just do our thing with the kids, kinda around each other. So no, I don't want to shelter them, because fighting happens, it's real life. But at 3 and 1 they don't need a full dose of reality. Not just yet.


What's something that people do in traffic that really annoys you?
Just one something? Because there is SO many.

Let's discuss traffic. I am a 3rd lane user. The FAR LEFT lane to be exact.

If the speed limit is 65 I will drive approx 73-75 mph. If you FLY up my ass I will NOT move over fast for you. If you are approaching me, and I can get over I will.

Please DO NOT drive in my lane if you are choosing to drive UNDER 70. It makes NO sense. MOVE. OVER.

I am aggressive. IF I need to get over, lets say to turn, and it's a busy day, and I put on my blinker and start moving in. I WILL GET IN. It is not a question. It is what I am doing. MOVE.

Oh and the best one. Merging.

I have always been good about merging early. And by my house the road goes from 4 lanes to 2 lanes. I am in the lane prior to the light. So when we go through the light, I am already where I need to be.

DO NOT. DO NOT attempt to pass me. Sure if your in a mustang and there is NO one in front of me, odds are pretty good that you can pass me. Go to town.

BUT if we are all in a line. And you and your snotty nose Escalade, attempt to do the above "blinker on and move over" move. You can bet your ass, you are NOT getting in. AT ALL.

Yep, you just gave me the finger. And yep, I know you live in McSnobly Subdivision right before mine.



Well now I feel better. Thanks.

Up yours. I'm outta here.

(be sure to have NO kids around some swearing)

Where we are. And where we want to be. Spaghetti and me

Last night was my phone date with Spaghetti. At his night job, on Wednesdays and Saturdays, he is in a room by himself. So I can talk to him for 3 hours. (from 10pm-1am) If I can last that long.

I told him about the 5 year plan book. So I read almost 1/2 of it to him. There are some area's to write in, as we talked I would write in our answers. I even made up Word Documents for the long ones.

We went over the three things we like best, and least about ourselves.

The happiest person we know.

The two people we like and respect the most and why.

We listed our top 5 values, mine were...(in no particular order) Family, Health, Wealth, Free time, and adventure. (Spaghetti asked that I don't share his)

There was a Wheel of Life, listing 12 areas of your life, and said that you should have a balanced life. And each section needs your attention, and to set a 5 year goal in these (and other) areas.

If you rated your life from 1-7. Where 1 means " not at all satisfied with my life" and 7 means "completely satisfied" I was 3.5 and Spaghetti was 2.

Sometimes I think we feel like we are settling because we have kids. And right now would not be a good time to travel, or do things with the kids being so young. Plus with Spaghetti working 3 jobs it gets hard to spend time together. Now in the winter, since Baseball season is over, he is down to two jobs. We can spend more time together.

Not saying that family life is making us miserable. Not at all. But the time spent sleeping, working and just day to day, is out weighing the fun and random adventures that Spaghetti and I spent the first 7 years together doing.

I think once the kids are potty trained, and just a few years old we will have more adventures. But for now, we are home bodies just trying to keep the roof over our heads, and food on the table.

We did talk about random trips. Like a day at the State Park, or just a day at our local parks, more time just the 4 of us. Which made me feel good. Not that I ever thought Spaghetti didn't want to do family stuff. But he is a happy homebody.

I must share one of Spaghetti's thoughts. It really made me proud. When I asked him "who one of the people he liked most and respected" he said me.

Because I work so hard at raising both kids by myself (no really, two day jobs and a night job, kinda restrict any child care) and that I am strong about it. I don't rely on anyone. And 24/7 I work hard.

I really felt that he knew how hard I worked when he told me that.

This was good talking last night. We talked about our future, our values, and where we want to be. Which is something everyone should evaluate within themselves and with the people in there lives. I am proud to say that this is a big help in our marriage. That we talk, Spaghetti is not a big talker, on feelings and what not. But if I can get a good book, or some good questions for him. He plays along, and it's healthy for us.

There is much more to this book, but for those of you who want to play along, go to Starbucks and get the olive green book, with the brown binding. In the binding, in gold it reads "Five" and in the front is an embossed 5, with "Where will you be five years from today?"

It's a $10 book, and it will do you good. Go get it. And decide where you want to be 5 years from today. Your welcome.

Stop taking it away.

Try to understand, this is so true.

Found it over on Tiptoeing through the Tulips