Last night was my phone date with Spaghetti. At his night job, on Wednesdays and Saturdays, he is in a room by himself. So I can talk to him for 3 hours. (from 10pm-1am) If I can last that long.
I told him about the 5 year plan book. So I read almost 1/2 of it to him. There are some area's to write in, as we talked I would write in our answers. I even made up Word Documents for the long ones.
We went over the three things we like best, and least about ourselves.
The happiest person we know.
The two people we like and respect the most and why.
We listed our top 5 values, mine were...(in no particular order) Family, Health, Wealth, Free time, and adventure. (Spaghetti asked that I don't share his)
There was a Wheel of Life, listing 12 areas of your life, and said that you should have a balanced life. And each section needs your attention, and to set a 5 year goal in these (and other) areas.
If you rated your life from 1-7. Where 1 means " not at all satisfied with my life" and 7 means "completely satisfied" I was 3.5 and Spaghetti was 2.
Sometimes I think we feel like we are settling because we have kids. And right now would not be a good time to travel, or do things with the kids being so young. Plus with Spaghetti working 3 jobs it gets hard to spend time together. Now in the winter, since Baseball season is over, he is down to two jobs. We can spend more time together.
Not saying that family life is making us miserable. Not at all. But the time spent sleeping, working and just day to day, is out weighing the fun and random adventures that Spaghetti and I spent the first 7 years together doing.
I think once the kids are potty trained, and just a few years old we will have more adventures. But for now, we are home bodies just trying to keep the roof over our heads, and food on the table.
We did talk about random trips. Like a day at the State Park, or just a day at our local parks, more time just the 4 of us. Which made me feel good. Not that I ever thought Spaghetti didn't want to do family stuff. But he is a happy homebody.
I must share one of Spaghetti's thoughts. It really made me proud. When I asked him "who one of the people he liked most and respected" he said me.
Because I work so hard at raising both kids by myself (no really, two day jobs and a night job, kinda restrict any child care) and that I am strong about it. I don't rely on anyone. And 24/7 I work hard.
I really felt that he knew how hard I worked when he told me that.
This was good talking last night. We talked about our future, our values, and where we want to be. Which is something everyone should evaluate within themselves and with the people in there lives. I am proud to say that this is a big help in our marriage. That we talk, Spaghetti is not a big talker, on feelings and what not. But if I can get a good book, or some good questions for him. He plays along, and it's healthy for us.
There is much more to this book, but for those of you who want to play along, go to Starbucks and get the olive green book, with the brown binding. In the binding, in gold it reads "Five" and in the front is an embossed 5, with "Where will you be five years from today?"
It's a $10 book, and it will do you good. Go get it. And decide where you want to be 5 years from today. Your welcome.
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