Let's bring Sexy Back

Once apon a time the Queen of Feisty, or Feisty as we all know her, was a skinny bitch.

People often asked her if she ate at all! She was skinny, pretty and never made the comments skinny bitches make. You know the ones about being "SO FAT" when they don't EVEN know the begining of fat. She knew better. She loved her flat tummy, and the ability to wear bootie shorts.

This was the day I found out I was pregnant with Bagel. I being the mad rubber stamper I am, stamped "baby" onto my tummy. I appologized to my tummy, and said it would be a long time till it was the pretty was it was here. Mind you I was a whole 11 lbs heavier then I wanted to be here! (at 118)

But this tummy was SO nice. SO very nice. I've always had a bootie, but as long as my tummy was skinny, I didn't care. (don't ask about the picture. Another story. Another time. I promise)

And then I had Bagel. Who was made of McD's Breakfast Burrito meal (2 burritos, 1 hashbrown, and 1 large coke) WHOLE packages of cinnimon rolls (the gooey ones you make in the oven. MMM) Dumplings, are you getting the picture? I took it upon myself to eat whatever I wanted because I could. And because I had to grow me a baby. I got myself up to a sexy 164.

Fast forward to being pregnant with Weaky. This is me at 25 weeks, I had lost almost ALL of Bagel's baby weight, I got pregnant with Weaky at 122, got back up to 167. After Weaky my postpartum hit me hard. I wasn't in the mood to diet, or even give a shit.

With a 22 month old, and a one month old I almost went insane. Spaghetti was working 3 jobs and only slept when he was home. It was up to me to care for the house, the kids, the dogs, the cats, and myself. Whom by the time I got to me I just wanted to sleep.

Remember this picture from earlier in this post. See those jeans? Size 5. Check me out below in them now...

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Yes those are them. And yes that is my black underware you see. My fat thighs stuffed in so I can't breath, but let's note the cute shirt. Mind you I bought that shirt the first time Spaghetti and I went to the mall together, 11 years ago. It was on clearence from Amberskinny & Bitch for like $5. Yes it was a half shirt on me then. But now it's barely a sports bra.

Let's point out that sexy ass belly that hangs over my pants. I am gross. I make myself sad. And repulsed. I haven't even gotten to the fat arms or my fat neck.

Either way here I am weighing in at...

(sorry to make you have to turn your heads)

137.5. I've got 30.5 lbs to go.

Lose it Bitch is SO on.

Like Donkey Kong.